Britain has a long standing history of creeping Fascism. “Britain First” is a slogan for white-supremacist zealots with a chip on their shoulder. However, fascism doesn’t end there. A “health” organization, called the National Obesity Forum, has suggested that the obese ought to pay a significant amount more money to their government (probably to pay for harsher prison conditions for detainees of Muslim background).

David Cameron already wanted to start increasing taxes on sugary drinks, and the NBF is saying that the taxes (twenty percent) needs to be increases (fifty percent). This is what this world has come to; a beautiful thick person has to be ridiculed and coerced into paying more just for their lifestyle.

The idea is regrettably catching fire. The British Parliament loves the idea so much that they are initiating a plan called “15% of David Cameron.”:

“The idea is simple you see, we judge everyone based on their ‘controllable’ characteristics and tax them if they are outside of 15% similarities with David Cameron.”

This proved difficult for some based on genetic heights and statures but the parliament is vigilant:

“For those that are 15% smaller, larger, thinner, or heavier than David Cameron…. your time will come.”

Toby Onatubee prefers to dip his long fingernails in ink and write in that style.