The U.S. Navy, the most technologically advanced military group in the world, has made a navigational error and found themselves in Iranian waters. The defense secretary supported these claims earlier today and supported the peaceful discussion the two countries are having over the matter.

When speaking to a few seamen they had quotes such as these to say:

“Yeah man, sometimes our compasses don’t have enough batteries and they like point west when they mean east.”

“Sometimes when the GPS is down, we have to put the sun at starboard, [and] none of us really know where that is.”

“I lived on that ship for close to a year and did nothing. I think they forgot about me.”

Clearly something fishy is going on with the U.S. Navy. What are the possibilities of a naval ship filled with highly professional sailors would collectively sail into the waters of a nation that we share geopolitical tension with?

Not likely at all, unless the U.S. Navy has been a hoax the entire time. What if the U.S. Navy has actually been a front for something much different. They don’t know where the sun should point, they don’t know how to work compasses and they think that we’ve forgotten about them. What if the U.S. Navy… are merpeople?

More about U.S. and Iran relations

Pauly Ridden has been to the beach twice, but still is able to have a killer tan.